Love is Love

So this week, the supreme court did some pretty big things. They dealt with major issues and even if they weren't fully sweeping with their decisions, they made it pretty obvious how they think the country should be heading with regards to two major social issues. They first ruled on affirmative action discriminating against white students applying for college. Their ruling was very interesting, but thats not what this is about. They also ruled on DOMA (defense of marriage act, signed by Bill Clinton in the 90's) and about the Prop 8 appeal that had put a stop to gay marriages in California until the appeal process was over. I'm not going to try and pretend that I know exactly what their rulings meant and all the legal business, but what I do know is that they are making moves toward equal rights for gay americans.

Now, I am a Christian and I believe in the Word, that Jesus Christ is my Savior, and that as a Christian it is my duty to show love to everyone just as Jesus would. So can I really be okay with Gay Marriage? Can I be okay with equal rights for all people? To be honest, saying the words "Gay Marriage" in the same breath makes me uncomfortable. Marriage is very sacred to me, and in the depths of me, those two words together sit a little funny with me. But regardless of how I personally feel, as humans, we deserve to love and love equally. I'm not one of those people who think that just because a man can marry and man and a woman can marry a woman, that the next thing coming is people wanting to marry their pet pig. Let's be real people, are we comparing human to human love to something as silly as that? Whether we want to believe it or not, marriage in America is in shambles, and straight people aren't doing it all that well, contrary to how we would all like to pretend we are doing.

In the bible it says a "man shall marry a woman" and "do not lay with another man" but the bible also says that women should not be in power. And most importantly it says you should love everybody. Ever heard of the "golden rule" , yeah, that comes from the bible. Let me give you this one piece from the bible:  James 4:11-12 (11) Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister judges them and speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgement on it. (12) There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you - who are you  to judge your neighbor?

Oh my gosh, there it is. Do not judge your neighbor. We can remember that the bible says don't be gay, but we can't remember to not judge our neighbor? How can we pick and choose which parts of the bible we believe to be true? That's right, we can't. The thing that I have always taken home the most from church, church camp, reading my bible is the basis of love. Love, love love. Love yourself, love others, Love Jesus, love. Love is an important human feeling. And we all love. But can we choose who we love?

A really smart friend of mine once asked me if I could remember making a conscious decision to be attracted to men. I thought about it, and said of course not. Of course not. Now I put myself in the shoes of gay men and women and wonder, did they ever THINK about who they were attracted to? Did they make a conscious decision to be like, hey yeah, I'm gay? Most likely not.

I'm not trying to make this long and crazy, but I know its getting there. I don't want to change your mind if you don't believe what I believe, I just have to get this off my chest. If society told me that I was wrong for loving Jordan and told me I couldn't marry him I would be devastated. I love just like everybody else loves. Jordan and I's love is no different than many other gay or straight couples in the world. So why do we treat gay people as second class citizens? It just doesn't make sense to me.

Right now gay couples are fighting for equal rights, they aren't fighting for everybody to jump for joy and be gay just like them, all they want is to be treated equal in the eyes of the country. Isn't our country based on freedom? We have been built up on certain religious beliefs, but church and state are to be separate. So why, legally, from a state perspective, are gay rights wrong? Religion is not to play a role in laws, etc, so why are we letting our personal (based on religion) beliefs rule this debate? We all don't have to agree, but isn't that why this country is great, we have freedom.

What really brought me to this rant today is hearing this song:
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis - Same Love
Do yourself a favor and watch the video and listen to the words. I was literally in tears hearing those words for the first time. I just hope that my children can grow up in a world filled with love, less hate and with the understanding that everybody should be treated equally.

Looming Deadlines

Sometimes I forget how different Jordan and I's life really is. We are just so used to our situation that I just assume everybody else lives the way we do. Being home for up to 5 days a week is just so normal to me, and honestly, sometimes its nice to have a day at home alone! But I have a feeling that those home alone days are going to be a lot more busy and probably more stressful once our new little person arrives in a about a month! In the midst of us being so used to our daily routines being apart, the stressfulness that comes with our lifestyle is sometimes overshadowed, and other days it rears its ugly head. Thats how it has been this week.

Jordan is in a very stressful situation with work. The FAA has a new law going into effect August 1st that says every pilot operating in the airlines has to have their ATP license, which basically means they need 1,500 flying hours and have passed a test and a check-ride. Doesn't sound so challenging does it? Well, for us its a bit more complicated. Jordan started in the airlines with low hours, which is totally legal, and he was very qualified to be trained in the plane he is currently flying. His training was 2 months long, so I would think at the end of that, he is qualified. About 6 months in, he had to head off and do military training for a new position he took in the Air National Guard. What was suppose to be an awesome job turned out to be on the chopping blocks for the Air Force and his 9 months of training didn't benefit him at all. Actually, it hurt him, a lot. It means that he missed out on 9 months of hours flying in the airlines. Now that is biting us right in our bootys.

The unions in the airlines protect their pilots by restricting their hours to no more than 100 a month. It is a very necessary rule, and I don't want my husband flying more than that a month, but when you have low hours and a looming deadline to get x amount of hours, you feel very helpless. Long story short, we still need about 300 hours before August 1st. We know that is not going to happen. So we pray, and pray hard that the FAA decides that for pilots who have been flying with airline companies and have over 1,000 hours can be allowed an extension to get their hours. At this point though, they are saying nothing. We are in total limbo.

At this point, as of August 1st, Jordan's company so graciously, won't fire him, but will place him on un-paid leave. Now isn't that nice of them? Do they forget how expensive it is to get flying hours without being paid to fly? I'm sure they still think they are doing us a big favor. I guess it could be worse though. August 1st Jordan is automatically de-qualified to fly the plane he has flown for more than 1,000 hours. The vast majority of his flying experience is in the airlines flying a jet with passengers on it. August 1st comes along, he is now not good enough because he is a couple hundred hours short of 1,500. This means that some other muck who has been flying around single engine prop planes around an airport and has no airline experience, no experience with passengers, no experience with multiple jet engines is more qualified to fly the plan Jordan knows like the back of his hand. Tell me how much that makes sense!

There are so many other factors playing into this situation right now that most days I just don't think about it negatively. In my head I just figure that the FAA will of course grant extensions to certain pilots who are so close to meeting the 1,500 hour rule. How could they not? It would be stupid for them to not do that. But the FAA is the government, and we all know that the government doesn't always do things that make sense. So now we just pray that things work out in our favor because Jordan has sacrificed so much for our family and has put so much hard work into this career that he truly loves. Oh yeah, and did I mention that we have a baby coming just before this deadline making things even that much more stressful? I'm just going to stay blissfully unaware of all the negative things that could (and probably will) happen, and pray for the small chance that things will work in our favor. Because, you can't dwell on the negative things, it will drive you crazy. Worrying is like a rocking chair, it'll keep you busy, but it won't get you anywhere.

Happy Father's Day

If there ever was a girl who defined "daddy's girl" it would be me. My daddy, yes I still call him daddy, is the epitome of a super dad and I couldn't have asked for a better father figure.

I followed my dad around and probably drove him so crazy, but he never said anything and let me tag along and ask all the "why," "how," and "what" questions a girl could think of. He taught me how to be independent and strong. He taught me that I could use a drill and even though I'm a girl, I could still get my hands dirty. Aside from all the things my dad taught me, almost any day in my childhood I can remember my dad being there. From the father/daughter dances, all the softball teams & games, swimming in the pool, Cedar Point trips, my dad always had something for us to do and was excited to spend time with his 3 daughters. Even if we weren't doing anything that was planned, my dad always made each day fun.

My dad can be a very quiet man. But he is confident, funny & can always put a smile on your face. My dad is the smartest man I know. He taught me right from wrong (whether I listened was another story). He is a gentle man who is always loyal. He loves my mom with all his heart and he is the perfect example of how a man should treat the women in his life. He always supported me in my decisions, whether he completely agrees with them or not.

Speaking of having 3 daughters, did I ever mention that us 3 girls are quite the handful? Cause we are. Even to this day, if we all 3 spend too much time together, somebody's feelings are going to get hurt at some point. My dad had his hands full with 3 strong willed daughters and even if he wanted to knock our heads together and make us all get along, he was supportive and never stopped loving any of us.

My dad has taught me so much about life and understanding that its not always fair and that its important to take school seriously and be the best I can be. He always had the corniest sayings. I swear he should have been an inspirational speaker with all the silly things he would say to us.  One of the most important things that has always stuck with me is how important it is to read, and to read to my future children. My dad read to me every night when I was little and I know that was important to my love for all things reading/writing & learning.

Over the years, I have learned how special my dad really is. I am so lucky to have so many happy memories as a child with my dad. I am even more lucky that I still have my dad to make many more years of memories. I am so excited to see him become a grandpa, to see all the fun he will have with his grandchildren. I talk to my dad almost every day, I can honestly say he is one of my best friends. I'm not sure what was going through his mind when he walked me down the isle to the man of my dreams, if he was worried he would lose his little girl, but I knew I would still always be my daddy's little girl.

Showered with Love

Today was our first baby shower. Let me just say, that no amount of "thank you" "you're the best" or any other words can begin to sum up how I feel.

The GREAT Grandma's-to-be! 

It is absolutely un-comphrendable how much love was felt today. There are far too many people to list to say thank you, but just know that every person who played apart in today is forever sealed in my memory and I will be forever grateful for all you did for us. My mom, my "cousin-in-law" Carrie and my sisters, Katie & Michelle, went above and beyond my wildest dreams for an amazing baby shower! The setting was absolutely perfect for a shower at the Lawton Community Center, a quaint little museum/reception hall/banquet facility was so stunning. The food was amazing and the cake was to die for! The games were fun and everybody really enjoyed themselves from start to finish.

My beautiful bridal party almost 3 years later! 

So many people came from all parts of my life, with really means the most to me. All of my bridesmaids (& flower girl) were able to come, which brought back so many happy memories. Friends from work, family friends, lifelong besties, family, and grandmas all made the journey to come celebrate our new beginning as parents. Some others weren't able to make it for a variety of reasons and even though they weren't physically present, I know they were with us in thoughts and would have loved to join us had they been able to.

The Grandmas-to-be! 

The amount of gifts and love blew me away today. Seriously. And then I got home and it blew me away even more to see it all in our house. Jordan couldn't believe it when I opened up the back end of our car and he saw all the lovely things. But at the end of the day, and for many years down the road, we won't necessarily remember the gifts, but we will remember how much love we felt and how this day made us feel. In the end its not about the gifts, the party location, or the food, but its about family and friends coming together to celebrate a new little life! We are forever grateful for everything that everybody did for us today. I am still in shock that we are this fortunate to have so many people surrounding us with love at this time in our lives. So many things are going to change for us, but we know that our family and friends will always be there to love us and support us anyway they can. With this many happy feelings filling me up today, its crazy to think that we still have 2 more showers with more family and friends! My heart just might explode with gratefulness in the next month!